First thing’s first: remember that there was a reason why you broke up. It’s easy to get relationship amnesia after a series of unsuccessful romantic entanglements. Sometimes failed dates or hook-ups can leave us sorting through our history and idealizing old, familiar partners.
Sometimes an old flame didn’t work out for one reason back then but would thrive now. Celebs break up and make up all the time (looking at you, Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck, or Khloé Kardashian and Tristan Thomson). Despite a series of flings since the breakup, it was clear Maggie was still not over Kim. Was it crazy to try weaving the love together? Maybe Not. Love always wins and getting the back together is one task the boys were willing to take a bullet for.
The relationship fix journey, especially if it was a contentious breakup, begins with reconciliation. Sometimes when a relationship dissolves, it’s because of a slow erosion that occurs in the connection and interactions between the two parties. Other times — more frequently — there is a precipitating event. One person betrays another, words are said that are so painful that there’s no turning back, addictions affect your joint life, one partner fails to show up to support the other person, the list goes on. Whether you were on the giving or receiving end of the behavior that ultimately terminatedthe relationship, to move forward, you need to make amends.
When it comes to making amends, I have read and experienced a lot. I always advised the boys that remorse, responsibility, recognition and remedy have to be considered. I call it the four R’s of The Relationship Fix. Maggie seemed ready to forget the there was a reason why they broke up. Everyone on the table was now eager to hear what Maggie had to say. Maggie started admitting how her friends forced her to behave the way she did to Kim. We needed to add some more drinks as Maggie started narrating what transpired to all what happened between the two.
“You see, some children are fatherless because their mothers want to prove a thing.” Maggie started off with that statement. This is what I wanted to try. I had friends of all kinds and those that have been broken with men. The more I could listen to them, the more I always tried to find every reason to make Kim go through hell. I have been surrounded with all kinds of ladies. . Both in broken marriages, single parents and also those that are married but are there just because of the society.
Kim has been a good father to his son. I have been trying to find faults in him. I felt like that was the only way he could prove to me that he was perfect. I wasn’t sure what I want in this life. I realized that we can get something that other people are longing to have. And since they can’t get it, they get jealous of us and want us to be in the same situation with them. It us so absurd that am learning all this when it seem to be late and am not certain if it could save me. Is it too late?
Maggie continued. We were all listening to her. ” I don’t know if we go back together things will be okay after confessing all this. Am not sure if Kim will ever find a place in his heart to forgive me for all this. And yes, am trying and I will do my best to change. But what about me? This confession will haunt me. A good part of me wants us to co parent for some reason but another half part of me wants us to be together? What do I do? I have already shown him the worst part of me. What if he is doing all this so he could have a good time to retaliate? Undecided, we tried to convince Maggie that Kim could not do such a thing to her. It was hard but we had to come through for her. Maggie seem to be an over thinker. We really had to be good listeners and try to understand her. She was so convinced that Kim was not going to do anything bad to her as soon as they get back together.
Without any reticence, Maggie woke up, pulled his chair and went straight and hugged Kim. The hug took quiet sometime. We were now convinced that Maggie was good with getting back with Kim. This was a great time for all of us to cheers.
